You hear that, Mr Andersen?

Dream, Creepy, No Movies

Since it seems a popular topic... here's Crazy Dream What I Had.

Near the beginning, I'm part of a group in some sort of wildlife sanctuary, though it had a TV-stage feel -- a bit brightly coloured and Tellytubbies-ish. There were some tuatara leaping about, and one in particular didn't seem afraid of us, and kept leaping very high, and we were worried it might hit us. Superlate got hold of it, and looking closely at some stuff around its eye, and said not to worry -- it was about thirty (implying that it was very old) and something-or-other meant that it probably had Alzheimers (which was why it was acting so crazy). At the time, I was very impressed by his House-like diagnostic skills, though on waking up, I realised that 30 is actually quite young for a tuatara. (Yes, that's the thing that bothers me, rather than whether lizards can get Alzheimers, or why it was fine that the normally lethargic tuatara were bouncing around like monkeys on meth. I cannot explain what makes sense to me when I first wake up.)

Then there was a section that seemed to be a mix of live action and animation. I don't really remember much about this, except there was a cow princess (you could tell she was a princess because of the tiara, and a cow because... well, four legs, black-and-white hide, all of that); she was very impressed by something I had done, and asked me to marry her. Drawing on the knowledge imparted to me by Princess Diaries Grandmere (the books, not the movies), I said, "That's very kind." (I remember not wanting to hurt her feelings, because she was a good and worthwhile person, but I was still going out with C in the dream, and -- well, um, cow!) There was other interactions going on... I think it was along the lines of the animated parts of Bedknobs and Broomsticks or Mary Poppins.

After a while, it turned out that Weta was doing a children's animated version of Lysistrata... it seemed odd in my dream, but all I could remember was that it was one of the famous Greek plays, it involved a woman, and it around the Sophocles/Aristophanes era. Oh, and that it didn't seem like it would translate well to a kid-friendly animated feature.

Anyway, with that in the back of my head, I was driving to work, and as I turned into Manuka St, the road was closed off with police cars. I was directed to turn around, and park on a side street off Weka (that doesn't exist there; it was one off Camperdown Road), and made to wait in a house. In the house was a crowd of people, and after a while a man in a cowboy hat approached me and asked, in an overly casual manner, whether I could get him a copy of the soundtrack of this new movie. I very politely told him that I was sorry, but my non-disclosure agreement meant that I couldn't help him, and anyway, that's not something we would be working on. Besides which, I wasn't really interested in that stuff; I was more a systems person.

That seemed to convince them, and I was allowed back into work. Apparently someone had let something leak onto the internet, but even in my dream, it seemed overkill to get the police involved if they didn't know exactly who did it... and then I started to check my email, which I think was boring enough to wake me up.

* * *

Of course, there are things that don't make sense to me, even after I wake up. Like... this guy's Giant Robot costume. On one level, nifty; on another, what the heck?

Or -- Thriller was a very innovative music video, but why is there a Crazy Indian version of it? I mean, someone spent money to replicate the video... it doesn't look like a parody or anything. So... huh?

Speaking of creepy, there's an artist who makes sculptures from bones. That's pretty creepy, right there.

* * *

And finally, there's an article in Variety about George Lucas, announcing that he's getting out of films. The reasons that he gives include the cost of feature films -- the sums involved make the whole process a huge gamble, and one that every studio will eventually lose, so it's better to start disengaging now, and focussing on television. He's quoted as saying, "I think the secret to the future is quantity."

Now, while I'm not sure I'm thrilled by the image of opening floodgates of schlock spewing onto the small screen, I think there is certainly a kernel of truth there. Television has a quicker turn-around, and you can see what resonates and what doesn't fairly quickly (some would say, too quickly). And the rise of the serial format opens up new possibilities for storytelling -- I wonder how much widespread on-demand viewing is drove this? With Tivos, DVD sets and internet-enabled viewing, a substantial chunk of the audience is used to watching several episodes in a row, rather than being drip-fed an episode every week or so.

Anyway, I can see the sense behind the statement. There's good evidence that a television series can be just as effective a tentpole as movies; witness Star Trek, Buffy, CSI... so why not take the money that would be thrown at a blockbuster, and try a couple of dozen pilots and a bunch of episodes?

I guess the main problem I can foresee is saturation; even now, I know that there are some pretty good shows out there that I just haven't had a chance to watch (Deadwood, Carnivale, Numb3rs, Prison Break...), and there are probably quite a few that I'd find compelling viewing, but have never heard of. So if the studios start funnelling more of their cash towards the box, how will people hear about good stuff? I imagine the current "branding" thing (with people watching Studio 60 because it's written by the same guy as The West Wing, or Angel and Serenity riding on the popularity of Buffy) will become even more important, which may mean that we get even more of the "pay for the name"-itis than currently.

Not that this will spell the death of the movie, or even the death of the blockbuster. As one of our artists said:

"Big movies ain't gonna die until someone comes up with something for unimaginative people to do on dates. As long as middle-class Americans frown on just getting drunk and jumping in the sack, we'll have work."

* * *

Quick edit: Cactus schnapps tastes pretty much like lime margarita, but with 20% alcohol. (I decided that Editorial would be the best place to try it.) Interesting, and there's no risk of accidentally freezing the bottle when you leave it in the freezer. Even so, I doubt it'll be on my "must repurchase" list. :)

Posted by svend at October 6, 2006 5:45 PM